You Want Me To Do What!
by NightReader22
Summary: Sammy discovered GISHWHES and Dean is dragged along for the ride!
1. Sammy?

"Um…Sammy?" Dean called out, staring at the pile of items on the dining room table and wondering if perhaps he was in fact still asleep.

"Yeah Dean?" Came the reply from down the hall towards the garage.

"Is there…is there something you need to tell me?" Dean asked.

Sammy walked into the kitchen and Dean stared as he added what looked to be about 20 pounds of bananas to the table. "What do you mean?" Sammy asked, looking distracted as he turned and headed back down the hallway.

Dean gave him a concerned look and followed. He was wondering if maybe Sam had accidentally picked up a cursed object while riffling around in the store room yesterday and did not want to let him out of his sight, just in case.

Sam, however, looked to be just fine…apart from his strange shopping. He was walking purposefully back to towards the garage while whistling a happy tuneless something.

Dean scratched his head, wishing he'd at least had a chance to make a coffee before his day went nuts. He was about to question Sam further, but stopped in shock as he stared at the contents of his Baby and the item that Sam was now offloading from the trunk.

"What the hell, Sam?!" Dean exclaimed. Was that a five gallon drum…of lube!? He rushed over to Sam, now definitely concerned at his mental state, spinning him around to stare into his eyes. Looking for any sign that he wasn't Sammy right now…or that he was not 100% there.

But they were definitely Sammy's eyes staring back at him, looking somewhat confused by Dean's behaviour for a moment before he burst out laughing. "I'm fine Dean!"

"Fine?! Then why the hell is my dining table covered in feminine hygiene products!?"

Sam's face broke into a ridiculous grin, "To make a porcupanda!"

* * *

 **Hi everybody! Sorry for the long wait, my muse has been a little distracted lately! However as we finish up GISHWES for another year, I couldn't help but wonder how Sam and Dean would react and a story was born! It was originally going to be a one-shot, but there were too many hilarious ideas to explore! I hope you enjoy!**

 **Welcome to all my new followers since last time! It's awesome to know my stories are still being read by lots of people when I am absent for a while!**


	2. Please?

Sam's answer did absolutely nothing to ease Dean's concern. What the hell was a porcupanda, and why did it require a ridiculous quantity of feminine hygiene products?

Sam didn't seem to care, he just passed the stunned and confused Dean the enormous tub of Lube before leaning into the trunk again and pulling out what appeared to be a robe, a tutu, a top had and a pair of fairy wings. "Come on." He said, leading the way back to the kitchen. "I'll show you!"

Poor Dean was left with no choice but to follow.

When they reached the kitchen Sam put his armful of items over the back of a chair, and took the tub off Dean and put it on the floor in the corner. "You make the coffee." He told Dean, "I'll be right back."

He disappeared down the hallway again before Dean could protest. He couldn't deny that a cup of coffee was likely to help the world start to make sense again, and so, seeing no other alternative right now (apart from possibly tying Sam to a chair until he started to make sense…the thought was tempting.) he turned on the coffee maker and found two clean mugs.

Sam returned with his laptop just as Dean took a sip of his coffee, letting out a sigh as he did the first normal thing all morning.

"Thanks Dean." Sam took his coffee and sat down at the table, opening the laptop in front of him and indicating for Dean to sit too.

Dean finally found his voice again. "You going to tell me what the hell's going on now?" He asked, surprisingly calmly.

Sam pulled up a purple webpage with the letter emblazoned across the top and some form of unidentifiable cartoon animal on one side. He turned the screen to face Dean and grinned. "I signed us up for a scavenger hunt!"

Dean looked at him in confusion. The phrase 'scavenger hunt' for him brought up memories of his father teaching them to find items for a hunt as quickly as possible during training exercises. He was damn sure they had never involved lube or tampons! "I don't get it."

Sam chuckled, "You know, a scavenger hunt! You get a list of things you have to find and you get more or less points depending on how difficult the item is to achieve. This one involves taking photos or videos of lots of different things and putting them on this website."

Sam looked so damn pleased with himself that Dean didn't know what to say. "Um…Ok. But, ah, when were you planning to tell me?"

Sam had the grace to look a little sheepish. "Today?"

"Today." Dean sighed, "And when does it start?"

Sam seemed to take that as acceptance, "Today! Here's the list!" He clicked a tab at the top of the page and an enormous list of crazy items appeared.

Dean's eyebrows shot up, "Today?!" He took a moment to scroll through the items at the top of the list. His mouth dropped open, and his eyebrows just about disappeared into his hair. "You want me to do What?!" He shook his head, pushing the computer back towards Sam and grabbing his coffee mug as he stood up.

Sam shot up, grabbing his arm and turning those damn puppy dog eyes onto full power. "Please Dean?"

Dean tossed his head back to stare at the ceiling in exasperation. Finally he gave a long suffering sigh. "Whatever. I'll help. But I'm not playing dress ups!"

"We are going to have so much fun!" Sam broke into such an excited grin that Dean couldn't help but smile, even as he wondered what the hell he had just gotten himself into.

* * *

 **Hi everybody! The craziness is about to start! For the uninitiated, have a look at** **.com!**

 **Thankyou to waitingforAslan and Guest for reviewing!**

 **Welcome to my newest followers and favourite-ers!**


	3. Really?

Dean made Sam wait until he had finished his coffee and toast before baffling him with any further scavenger hunt discussion.

That didn't stop Sam from continuing to quietly offload an assortment of random an ridiculous items into the kitchen before starting to peel the copious amounts of bananas. Dean watched, both confused and fascinated, as Sam carefully peeled each one, laying the peel into a container on one side and the bananas into a container on the other side.

Finally Dean gave in to his curiosity. "What are you doing?"

Sam looked up from what had to be his twentieth banana, "I'm peeling bananas."

Dean rolled his eyes at him, "Why?"

Sam chuckled, "Well, the peels need to be sewn together into a hammock and the bananas are to be baked into bread in the shape of an aeroplane."

Dean blinked at him, wondering for the thousandth time that morning what he had agreed to. "Right…"

Sam wasn't at all fazed by his lack of enthusiasm. "You know how to bake banana bread, right?"

Dean sighed and took his dishes to the sink. It was true, but it was a pain to do. "You know I only do that for special occasions."

Sam just grinned, "This is a special occasion! How often do we do crazy things just for fun?"

It was said cheerily, but it just about broke Dean's heart. Sadly, Sammy was right. They almost never did Anything just for fun. Could he really deny his little brother a day of fun? "Oh, alright. I think we're going to need more flour though." He looked at the growing pile of bananas and had no doubt he would be expected to use ALL of them.

Sam laughed, "It's waiting for you in the hallway, we were running out of room in here!"

Dean rolled his eyes and quickly cleared the table before going to get the flour.

"Ummm…Sammy?" Dean found himself questioning his sanity again. "How many hours do you think are in a day?"

"Huh?" Came the confused reply.

The side of the hallway was lined with all manner of ridiculous items whose purpose Dean didn't even want to ask. "Making a hammock and that much bread is going to take nearly all day, what on earth are you going to do with the rest of this stuff?!"

Sammy burst out laughing as Dean dragged a sack of flour into the kitchen. "The hunt isn't a day Dean!"

Dean froze, "What?"

"It's a whole week!" Sam declared happily.

"Oh Sam…Really?!" Dean groaned, why the hell did he agree to this?

* * *

 **Hi everybody! Sorry for the delay in posting this one, I've had it written for ages just haven't had a chance to upload! I hope you are continuing to enjoy this bit of lighthearted fun! Let me know what you think!**

 **Welcome to my newest favourite-ers and followers!**


	4. And you expected?

It was several hours later when Dean finally took the opportunity to sit down and take a break and eat something other than uncooked banana bread mixture. Despite the fact that the kitchen smelled awesome from the several loaves of bread baking in the bunkers kitchen, he was pretty sure he'd never want to touch another banana again when this was over. He still had to make them look like an airplane yet… He grabbed the laptop to look for some inspiration.

First he checked the GISHWHES item list. If he was going to do this, he was going to do it right. "Put those bananas to good use. Make banana bread in the shape of an airplane, the bigger the better!" Dean read the instructions under his breath and rolled his eyes. "Oh hell. Let's do this."

He opened another tab on the computer and set about finding an appropriate plane to model his bread on. He settled on the C-5M Super Galaxy, a huge military transport. By the time the timer went off for the first batch of bread to come out of the oven he had planned out how to cut and layer the bread on scraps of paper and decided to use some of the not yet used bananas to mash up and use as glue.

Sam walked in as he reloaded the ovens with the second batch of bread. Thank goodness the Bunker had a commercial size kitchen or this would be impossible.

"That smells awesome." Sam told him taking a deep breath and reaching out to pull some bread off the side of the nearest loaf.

Dean smacked his hand away. "No touching! You can have some offcuts soon."

It was Sam's turn to raise an eyebrow in surprise. He took a moment to actually take in the kitchen and realise just how much Dean had got into his task. There were enormous mixing bowls and spoons in the sink, half a dozen loaves of bread on the bench and the same again now cooking, scraps of paper with notes and drawings all over the table and more tossed in the general direction of the bin.

He chuckled and held his hands up in a clear gesture of 'not touching.' "Ok. Can I help? I could use a break from sewing banana skins. Those things are slippery."

Dean snorted, "And you expected…?"

Sam laughed, "Fair point. So, can I help?"

Dean looked around, frowning thoughtfully. "Um…well, I kind of know what I want where…" His gaze settled on the remaining bananas. "Oh! You can mash those for me."

Sam shrugged, "Um, ok. Are you making another batch of bread?" He sounded surprised, 12 loaves of banana bread did seem like enough after all.

Dean shook his head, already distracted by one of the hot loaves and a sharp knife. "No, that's the glue." He glanced at one of the scraps of paper and began carefully carving the nose of the plane.

Sam smirked to himself, he knew Dean would enjoy this.

* * *

 **Hi everybody! I hope you are still enjoying this bit of silly fun!**

 **Thankyou to Doclover and Guest for reviewing! (and to answer your question, guest, a porcupanda is the GISHWHES mascott! lol)**

 **Welcome to my newest followers and favourite-ers!**


	5. Where Did You Find Those?

It was three hours later when Dean was satisfied with his banana bread creation, a surprisingly accurate and ridiculously large model military aircraft.

Sam helped him to take some photos which did it justice and then showed him how to upload the best one to the GISHWHES website, before returning to his nearly finished hammock while Dean was left with the mountain of dirty dishes.

"We need an industrial dishwasher!" Dean grumbled loudly to Sam. "Or any dishwasher…" he muttered to himself as he scrubbed yet another loaf tin.

He heard Sam laugh from the other room, "Sure Dean, I'll just whip one up from these banana peels, shall I?"

Dean rolled his eyes, "Smart Arse!"

Despite his grumbling the dishes were soon washed and left on the sink to dry and Dean went to investigate the hammock that Sam had been working on all morning.

"Whew!" Dean scrunched his face up in disgust. The kitchen may have smelt of bananas and bread all morning, but the war room where Sam was working just stank of stale banana skins. "You better get that smell out when you're done!"

Sam snorted, "I think I've become immune at this point. But," He grinned and picked up the end of a collection of stitched skins, "I think I'm done." He looked around, "We just need somewhere to hang it…"

Dean sighed, "Hold on, I'll get a sheet to hold up behind it and we can tie it between two of the pillars." The scavenger hunt may be just for fun, but that didn't mean he wanted to potentially give away their location with telling photos.

Sam laughed, "Perfect!" He dragged the hammock over to the nearest pillar and tied one end off at an appropriate height, before looping the rope attached to the other end to another and dragging the hammock up.

Dean came back with a sheet and some brooms and managed to rig it up behind the hammock. "There you go. Hop in and I'll take the photo."

Sam looked suitably disgusted at the suggestion and Dean smirked, "Hold on then, it needs a little something."

Sam waited curiously for Dean to return, before cracking up laughing when Dean walked in with a pair of flower leis and a coconut bra. "Where the hell did you find those?!"

Dean shrugged non-committedly, "I found them."

Sam snorted, "Uh-huh." Still, he couldn't deny that they made the picture much more festive draped over the side of the hammock and soon a second photo was submitted to the site.

* * *

 **Hi everybody! Whoops, sorry for the wait! I had this chapter written and forgot to post it! I will be trying to post more regularly again!**

 **Thank you to Doclover for reviewing!**

 **Welcome to my newest followers and favourite-ers!**


	6. Why not?

"Pass me another tampon."

Dean looked at Sam over the top of his bottle of beer. "Really?"

Sam nodded, looking so serious that Dean snorted before taking another sip. "Come on, Dean, if I let this go before the hot glue dries it'll fall apart!"

Dean glanced at the vaguely animalistic looking creation Sam was currently constructing from the mess of feminine hygiene products scattered about the TV room. Sam turned on the puppy dog eyes and he sighed, sitting the beer down and turning away from the mindless program he hadn't really been watching anyway.

"What size?" He asked, scanning over the mess.

Sam looked at his creation thoughtfully. "I need the legs to hold its weight…So give me a couple of the big ones."

Dean fished through the pile and pulled out four large tampons and passed them to Sam. "People must have thought you'd gone nuts when you were buying this." He commented.

Sam snorted, "I think they thought I was a very confused boyfriend."

Dean laughed, "Probably safer than trying to explain to them that you were planning on making a… What is this again?" He tilted his head, trying to make sense of the collection of glued together pads and tampons that Sam had been working on for the past half hour or so.

"It's a Porcupanda." Sam told him, nodding to the picture he'd printed from the GISHWHES website. "It's a panda with porcupine spines."

Dean picked up the picture. "Why?"

Sam shrugged, "Why not?"

Dean didn't have an answer for that.

"You can make the head, if you want." Sam told him as he continued attempting to get the thing to balance on its tampon legs.

Dean sighed, "Sure. Why not." He looked at the picture again, focusing on the head in particular this time. Then, he picked through a scattered packet of pads, occasionally holding one up against the body Sam had created.

They continued to work in silence for several minutes, with the occasional noise of frustration from one or the other as things didn't go as planned.

"Oh! Damnit!" Dean peeled a pad off his hand, having tried and failed to unstick it from itself when he'd make the mistake of folding it wrong. "These things are such a pain!"

Sam tried and failed to supress a laugh, and suddenly found himself with one stuck to the side of his face. "Hey!" He picked up a stray tampon and lobbed it back at Dean, hitting him square on the nose.

"Oi!" Dean threw it back, bouncing it off the top of Sam's head.

Soon both were laughing madly as pads and tampons and their various wrappers went flying around the room.

The mini battle came to an end when Dean's, thankfully nearly empty, bottle of beer crashed to the floor as Dean was dodging a tampon box. "Whoops…" Sam tried to keep a straight face…and failed.

Dean rolled his eyes. "I'll get the dustpan. You can pick up…all that." He waved a hand in the general direction of the floor as he exited the room.

That sobered Sam up and he sighed. He started pushing everything into a pile.

Once the clean-up was complete they sat back down to examine their progress.

Dean had collected a black permanent marked when he collected the dustpan and then mop, and used it to finish his panda head. "There you go." He said proudly, passing it to Sam to glue onto the front of his body.

Sam grinned, "Who knew you were such an artist."

Dean snorted and made a mocking bow. "It still needs spines." He commented.

Sam nodded, "Can you find where the small tampons went?"

Dean rolled his eyes, "You didn't think to put them aside?"

Sam shrugged. "They're…somewhere over there." He pointed to the pile he'd created from the mess on the floor.

Dean went hunting. "How are you going to make them into spines?" He asked, tossing a packet to Sam, who held up the hot glue gun in response.

A total of four packets were eventually glued onto the back of the thing, with the hot glue gun used to turn the strings into spines.

Dean stared at their finished product shaking his head slightly as if he couldn't quite believe what he had just been a part of.

For his part, Sam looked proud of their efforts. They'd done a surprisingly good job of matching the picture.

And with that picture number three was taken and uploaded.

* * *

 **Hi everybody! I'm so sorry for the long delay! Real life got in the way, and then my computer had to go in for repairs! But I am hoping to be able to get back into writing regularly again! Thank you for everyone who had been reading and reviewing in my absence and especially those who sent me a message to encourage me to keep going with this story! I hope you enjoyed the new chapter!**

 **Big thanks to Doclover and beckini for reviewing the last chapter!**

 **Welcome to my newest followers and favourite-ers!**


End file.
